My life. So exciting.

I wish I had one thing interesting going on in my life to talk about.  But the truth is my life is boring.  Wait, that's not exactly true.  It's Boring (with a capital B). 

Honestly, I'm kind of glad to have some boring in my life because I feel like I have a chance to breathe.  This past week has been pretty much nothing but finishing Christmas shopping and getting my house ready for the whole family to come over and for house guests.  Because, you know, fake daughter just moved out last week so I didn't want to go too long without someone staying with me.  In the two years I've lived in my house, the longest span I've gone without someone staying with me is 5 weeks.

This weekend I cleaned and cleaned and cleaned some more.  It's amazing what having 2 teenager/young adults living in your house for 8 months will do to a place.  I didn't sit down for 2 days and I still didn't get everything done.  Now I was also trying to hook up a new tv and AT&T U-Verse box in my bedroom which didn't go so well.  I went out and bought a different kind of cable and tried again last night to hook it all up.  It still didn't go well.  So I called their customer service last night and they ran an equipment check while I was on the phone with them and immediately said my equipment is f*^&&* up and they need to send someone out and they are scheduled to come figure out what is going on this Saturday afternoon.  I was glad to know it was their equipment that is messed up and not my mad technology skillz.  I will hopefully have everything working so I can lay in bed and be lazy and watch tv for hours by Saturday evening.  Only I can't lay in bed and watch tv for hours and be lazy until the next weekend because my mom and her husband are coming from Texas and they'll be here Saturday afternoon and will be staying with me for a week. 

My mom's husband likes to do stuff around my house and be busy so I'm trying to come up with a long list of crap that needs fixed.  I should have left the task of putting together a clothes hanging rack for him.  Instead I did it myself on Sunday night.  It's from Ikea.  And Ikea stuff is a giant pain in the bedonkadonk to assemble.

The guest room they sleep in does not have any rods, shelves, etc. in the closet.  And the room and closet are lined in bead board and stained.  The closet is really long and it has 4 french doors.  That means I'm going to have to stain rods to match everything since you can see through the doors so basically what I'm saying is that I'm going to pay someone to install rods.  Someday.  (No, it's not something I would want to ask my mom's husband to do.)  And I have some alternative ideas to rods but it's stuff that will require manly tools that I don't own and don't want to buy so if I go that route I will still pay someone to do it.  They normally hang stuff in a closet in another room, but my cat has ruined that room with her IBS because the tile in that room was apparently not sealed before I bought my house so now it's stained with cat poo and I will have to have it re-tiled if I can't figure out how to clean it.  And welcome to my fun life when it comes to having house guests and cat poo issues.  My cat is still not doing very good despite expensive raw food which she suddenly refuses to eat.

Anyway, I bought a rolling clothes rack from Ikea in January, 2011 because I was going to use it to hang wet clothes on that I didn't want to put in the dryer.  In February, 2011 I did my awesome post-pedicure swan dive onto my face and broke my arm so I had never put this clothes rack together and last week I suddenly remembered it was still in the box in a closet in the room fake daughter had been living in.  I figured I could put it together to stick in the guest room closet until I can afford to have something better put in there so my guests don't have to go to another part of my house and look at cat poo stains when they want to pick out something to wear.

I haven't cursed so much in a long time as I did when I was trying to put that stupid thing together with Ikea and their stupid instructions that only have pictures and no words.  It had 7 poles and the instructions just showed poles but had no written words to tell me if I was supposed to use the long poles or the short poles or the medium poles or whatever in certain steps. 

It's supposed to roll which means it has wheels which if I read Ikea pictures correctly, are supposed to just click into place.  In all honesty, that was the only place they had words in the instructions.  They showed someone putting the wheels in and it said "click" beside it.  But they didn't click at all.  The wheels just fell back out.  So now I have a non-rolling clothes rack and if my mom's husband gets super bored he can take all of their clothes off of the rack and try to click the wheels into place.  It's also a little wobbly but that's Ikea's fault because one leg is wonky and it's not due to a lack of assembly talent on my part.  I stuck a book under that leg and it's perfect as long as you don't want it to roll and don't want to read "The Shack" while guests are staying at my house.

The only other interesting thing is that I went to the girly doctor last week and found out I have a fibroid tumor that has almost doubled in size in the past year.  It's not giving me any problems and normally they don't do anything if they don't bother you.  I've had a few of them for several years.  Apparently the doctor thinks it's bad that one of them grew so much that fast so he has referred me to an oncologist but he says he does not at all think I have cancer.  He just wants me to see a specialist and this specialist happens to be a gynecological oncologist and he said she might recommend a hysterectomy.  Oh good grief.  So I will enjoy my boring life until I go see the specialist the first week of January.  That's honestly all I know at this point so I can't tell you anything else.  Except that when I was leaving the doc's office I saw a guy in the elevator that looked very much like these gentlemen:

Another lady and I both commented to him about his unusual attire for a doctor's building and he just looked at us and offered no explanation.  He then bid us a good afternoon as he got off the elevator.

How are y'all?