Let me tell you the best thing to go with a nice bottle of red wine: the trashiest junk food you can find.

I am still swamped but I just had something happen here at work that has me so pissed off I can't see straight right now so I'm taking a break anyway to write.  I'm hoping it will get my mind off of what happened.  And I know I need to let it go because I'm just letting this person hold power over me by affecting my day, but I am fuming I am so angry. 

I'm going to try and let it go now.

Let's think happy thoughts and go back to last week when I was in Blue Ridge instead of being fuming mad.

After my mom and I got off of our feet after our wasted walk to the stupid Black Sheep and slept a few hours and could walk again, we got up the next morning and leisurely got ready to go out and then we had coffee and a cupcake in our suite as an appetizer before going out for breakfast just because we could.  We walked (slowly and painfully) two doors down to the Blue Ridge Grocery which really isn't a grocery store and had a wonderful breakfast after our cupcake appetizer and before we hit the shops again.

Here is a photo of the Grocery.  It's really cool:

We went to the Blue Ridge Olive Oil Company where you can sample more olive oil and vinegar flavors than I think I ever knew existed.  My mom and I each got a small bottle of an oil and one small bottle of a vinegar and they draw it, bottle it and seal it for you right out of the vats (or whatever they are called) to order.  They have recipes on their website and I think you can purchase online.  It is super good stuff.  And I wasn't fuming mad at all when I was in that shop.

Here's the guy sealing my oil and vinegar.  Another lady bought all of the ones on the right.  I'm only one person - I can't use that much.  I did go to the June Gardens School of Photography for this special blurry shot:

At some point we stopped in Huck's General Store and the guy working in there?  Well he was a talkative kind of fellow.  By the time we left we knew all about his old neighborhood up in Connecticut, the celebrities that have bought homes up there, all about where his wife grew up, etc.  But mostly I learned that there are some really weird soda flavors out there in this great big ol' world we live in:

In a million years I could never drink something called Kitty Piddle. Or Bug Barf.  And I'd rather eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich than drink one.  And I cannot imagine drinking buffalo wings.

At some point, my mom had a great idea.  We had a late breakfast so we didn't really want lunch, but she decided we should stop for dessert and coffee.  We had heard good things about a place in town that I'm not going to name here so we went.  Apparently their dessert specialty is homemade pie.

We sat outside at a small table and my mom was looking across the street at another place that had a sign out front that said they serve Greenwood ice cream.  My mom is a huge fan of Greenwood ice cream (I don't know that I've never had it even though they make it 15 minutes up the road from my office).  I think they only serve it in restaurants but I'm not sure.  I just know I've never seen it in a store around here.  We had already ordered coffee but my mom said we should go over there for the ice cream.  I convinced her to stay for pie.  I probably should have listened to her.

Our server said she was only the beverage person and the pie guy would be out shortly.  Y'all, the pie guy was kind of odd.  My mom asked him what kind of ice cream they had to go on the pie and I think she was asking about flavors but he replied, "It's just the basic ol' Ingles store brand."  So we shared a slice of blueberry pie with the basic ol' Ingles store brand ice cream on top.  While we were sitting there, an elderly couple walked up and we quickly discovered we had just met Mrs. Bossy Pants and her poor husband.  There was a bench right next to our table and she decided she was going to sit there.  She had a rolling cart with her and she said, "I always bring my cushion for my tushie with me.  I know how hard these benches are."  And she pulled a pillow out of her cart, tossed it on the bench and sat down.  She then ordered her husband to walk to the car and put bag A inside bag D and then take bag B and put it in the back seat and then take bag C and stick it up his rear end.  Y'all she was so dang bossy!

The poor man never said a single word.  He just stared at her, then sauntered off slowly.  She looked at my mom and I and said, "Bless his heart.  I don't think he hears a word I say."  No lady, he is just sick to death of hearing you talk so he's ignoring you.

Then she just kind of talked and I guess she was talking to us but her back was to us so we ignored her just like her husband did.  Suddenly she got a little animated and excited when a couple of women walked past and one of them was wearing a vest.  She turned to us and exclaimed, "I am paying attention to these women who are wearing vests today!  So I'm watching them!" 

My mom was wearing a vest......

The lady didn't seem to notice.  We just ignored her mostly because I had no idea how to respond.

She continued to just sit on her pillow on the hard bench just talking out loud (to us?  to herself?) and a few minutes later I looked at my mom and I suddenly burst out laughing.  Y'all, I couldn't help it.  She didn't seem mentally ill.  She just seemed to think she had a lot of important stuff to say and order people around about.  She was also dressed kind of like 1970s Grand Ol' Opry.

After I started laughing I could not stop.  And then my mom started and couldn't stop.  So we decided we should leave.  We walked a few doors down to a used book and wine shop.  My mom wanted to buy a bottle of wine made in Georgia, and I decided to buy one as a joke to someone because of the name of it (it's called Blood Mountain Red and I have a friend who got lost hiking on Blood Mountain). 

As I was checking out, the cashier said, "You know, this wine goes great with junk food!"

"Um, okay.  Good to know."

"The best thing to eat with this wine is a nice bag of Cheetos.  But make sure you get the crunchy hard kind and not the puffy kind.  It's much better with the hard crunchy Cheetos."

Y'all, she was being completely serious.

I then went on to buy a Himalayan salt inhaler and I will let y'all know how that goes and whether it helps the breathing problems I've suffered from since childhood.  Last night I bought some sleeves for my feet to help my plantar fasciitis, and I'm already supposed to let y'all know how the WalkFit Platinum shoe inserts work which I've been wearing for a month or two now.  What else would y'all like me to try out and review for you?  Please make it not something super expensive.  Apparently I am the experimenter now.  I do prefer to experiment on all natural types of remedies for stuff so keep that in mind.

We also made sure to stop in Glitzy Chix because they sell some of the best lotion I've ever used in my life.  We each bought a bottle two years ago and I had saved the empty bottle so that I would not forget what kind it was the next time I made it to Blue Ridge.  It's called Shine Shea Butter and the smell is awesome.  It says on the website that it's a vanilla scent but I don't think it smells like vanilla.  We each bought two bottles this year.  It's not super cheap, but it only takes a little bit each time you use it.  So yes, I spent $70 on lotion and salt to sniff.  And another $15 on a bottle of wine.  I still have to go spend money on hard crunchy Cheetos though.

The next morning we sadly left our awesome suite, went and checked out, then stopped for breakfast.  On our way out of town we stopped by Mercier Orchards where you can buy healthy stuff like apples.  Naturally I bought chocolate honey, several kinds of jams, and an apple fritter.

It's really gorgeous at the orchards:

Then I threw my mom in the car and we peeled rubber out of the orchard parking lot because I could not wait to get back to Atlanta and all of it's traffic. 

Just kidding.

We leisurely drove home, my brother stopped by that night and we went out to dinner, then my mom and I shuffled cards til the cows came home while we played our last night of Hand and Foot.

My mom had to head back to Texas on Thursday and I enjoyed a pajama day until my brother came over and we dressed up and went to my neighbors to hand out Halloween candy.  I only made two kids cry this year.  Highly disappointing.  My wig was a little jacked up.  My brother went all out and wore a tux.  I wore a t-shirt and jeans.